Thinking

When you are away from home, away from the everyday tasks and such, your awareness for what is really going on is heightened.
I prayed for God to reveal to me what it was about myself, to please release me of any selfish and unloving thoughts towards my husband. And it happened. Over these last few weeks, my love for him has grown and matured. It is indescribable. I have never felt this kind of love for him before. I know that the love I have for him has come from strength given to me by God.
As much as I was hurt by this turn of events, I had helped get us there over the years. I am no angel. I have failed my husband in many ways. I slowly broke him down over time. I have disrespected his authority in our home.
I will repeat this because it bears repeating, I know that we didn't get to this point just because of me, but I cannot change my husband, I will not accuse him of things, I will no longer speak ill words of him with friends. We do things like that when we're venting about our daily lives but it will always come back to bite you in the butt. Those petty vents with our friends and family about our husbands lead to cracks in the foundation. When the foundation of a house starts cracking, then the whole house eventually has cracks. Sometimes, they go from the floor to the ceiling. They are really unattractive, too. Sometimes, those cracks are big enough to divide people in the house.
But, there is hope! Foundations can be repaired! The walls can be repaired! The family can be restored! It can start with the outstretched hand of one person. When one spouse has gone astray, the marriage can still be revived, as long as the other spouse holds onto them with one hand and the other firmly holding the hand of Jesus. He makes all things new.